Reinventing Me

Something snapped,
Something broke,
A long and arduous journey,

Step by Step
Moment by moment
Feelings of numbness
Persistence forgotten

Courage insistent despite death’s lure
Courage to continue
Courage to try
Courage to be present
Courage to be

despite numbness
despite emptiness
despite

stewing and sitting, sleeping and purging, searching and trying,

Broken open
trying not to harden

left with nothing more

And a seed remained
a seed that remembered courage
a seed stating to go on
a seed needing care and love

and even though it snapped
and even though it broke

something said “it’s time”
time to reinvent

to start a new beginning
to start a new me
to start a new everything

move toward a vision
despite the emptiness in me
trust in me
trust I can believe
trust I deserve to be a new me.

So without feeling,
without a stir,
I release all expectations and start this journey to be me.

Hoping to feel again,
Hoping to draw on persistence and tenacity
knowing they served in the past,
knowing they risk
loss and pain.

Release the fear
Try a new
Trust in the ability to create
despite the cycle of life.
despite the truth

Live to feel all it’s adventure, good and bad.
Time to create a new and stronger me.
In celebration of life
In Celebration of Truth.
In Celebration of My love.
In Celebration of loving ME
I’m setting myself free
Watch out, here I come.